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For students at NS, parents are a major part of life. The majority of students live with one or both of their parents, so they are involved with the important life decisions students are making. But do parents really know what’s best for their kids?
“I love my parents,” junior Anna Wright said. “We’ve been through some rocky roads, some mountains.”
For students who disagree with their parents, often about personal issues, confrontation can happen often. Some resolve their differences calmly, but Wright was vocal about her more contentious arguments with her parents.
“Last year we fought all the time. [It was] really bad, but it’s gotten better,” Wright said.
Many of these contentions stem from issues surrounding communication between parents and their children. For Wright, the problem seems to be a lack of good two-sided conversation.
“I wish they would listen to what I have to say,” Wright said. “I start talking about something, and then my dad will turn it into a lecture, and I end up crying.”
Even with stronger communication skills, children will never fully agree with their parents on every subject, and disagreements will arise. Senior Alex Larsen knows this from experience.
“There’s a lot of times that I disagree with them just because I have a very different way of thinking,” Larsen said. “If I don’t believe what they believe I’ll let them know.”
Beliefs, especially in an area with such a predominant religious presence, can be a subject of contention between parents and children. For some, the pressures that come with being a part of a religious community manifest themselves in the wishes of parents. Such is the case with Andy Orton, a former student at NS who now attends Snow College.
“I grew up LDS—like most people around here. I kind of fell out of it, but my parents were really supportive. At first they weren’t, of course. They gave me a hard time,” Orton said. “When I turned 18 we argued for like three or four months, consistently, every Sunday. And it wasn’t just calm arguing, they were yelling at me to come to church and stuff.”
For Orton and others, the pressure to serve an LDS proselyting mission is felt deeply.
“I told my dad that I didn’t want to go on a mission, and I remember him coming down the stairs and crying… he’s really passionate about the church,” Orton said. “The LDS church definitely makes good people, but I don’t think it’s required.”
For others, such as Wright, there are different pressures that come along with having parents who are passionate about their beliefs. For girls, especially during this time of year, modestly can be a problem.
“For my prom dress last year… my dad freaked out because you could barely see my shoulder through the lace,” Wright said. “They’re really strict on the modesty stuff. It doesn’t make sense to me.”
Regardless of where disagreements and contention come from, it seems that by trying to see things from the perspective of their parents, students can gain a new respect for them.
“I respect my parents,” Larsen said. “I mean, everyone has their own challenges and they’ve had their own as well.”
Hopefully seeing parents as people who truly want what’s best for their children will help students to understand the reasons for the pressures and strict regulations—even when children and parents disagree.
“I do see their perspective. They want the best for me, but I think their idea of what’s best for me is different than mine,” Orton said. “If your parents aren’t bad people, they’ll want the best for you. They’re not going to try to do anything harmful to you.”
